Our Little Pumpkin

Tonight I'm sharing pictures of Nathaniel in his Halloween "costume." This is also the first outfit he received as a gift (his grandmother purchased for us in 2006 shortly after we found out that we were expecting).

Baa Baa Black Sheep Has Some New Lyrics

My mom is here this week -- keeping the baby while I'm at work.

On Sunday night, she was singing Baa Baa Black Sheep to Nathaniel and she came up with some new words.

Baa, baa black sheep have you any wool?
Yes, sir, yes, sir, 3 bags full.
One for the master, one for the dame,
One for the little boy who SHOULD LIVE AT LANE.

Wishful thinking for maama. We think she should live here!

IF still sucks!

DH and I are both currently carrying around benefit option stuff from work. I wanted to get everything done tonight (so I can stop carrying it around), but infertility makes insurance decisions complicated. I am switching back to a ppo for baby and I and I'm also adding dh. We don't plan to use it unless it is really needed for dh, but the state pays for it, so why not take it!

I also had to decide about an FSA. How much if any to hold out for 2008? Will we be doing IVF? Will I be pg?

And then the biggie . . . what happens if I quit my job? Dh's insurance is fairly reasonable, but his packet is very vague about coverage. I'm primarily concerned about drug coverage since I know we'll have to pay out of pocket for IVF. The drugs last time cost less than 500.00 with insurance, but without it it can be up to 6,000.00 just for meds. Ouch! I may have to keep my job just for the crappy coverage it DOES provide. (They did end up paying about 2,000 for the procedure too, but I'm not counting on that).

I'm still considering going to work at a company that covers IVF, like Fed Ex Kinkos or Integris, just long enough to get coverage.

Ahh, the things we do because of IF!

New Pictures

Nathaniel had new professional photos taken on Monday. I think I emailed an access code to everyone. If I didn't get one to you, let me know.

These photos were taken over the past few days.



I think he looks like me in this one.



He scratched his face up nicely for his pictures.

Weekend

The rest of my birthday weekend was much better than Thursday. Dh was home on Friday. We had a great time with baby and then went to watch a movie before going out to dinner with the family at my favorite piizza place. Saturday, I went shopping with MIL, SIL, grandma and a niece and nephew. I definitely didn't fit in the size I wanted, but I plan to get serious about my weight again next week. I did buy a few thing though. Baby got some long sleeved onesies and socks.

Baby slept through the night on Friday and Saturday nights, although he went to bed late both nights. I think his teeth really hurt so his schedule is off. He tries really hard to be happy but he hurts. He has a new trick. He was sitting sideways on my lap yesterday and discovered that if he fell bacwards, I would catch him. So, he started doing it again and again. He can stand at the ottoman by my chair by himself, too. And he tried to climb up the outside of his crib when we were walking around yesterday. He's a busy boy.

Disappointed

Okay, I'll explain why I'm disappointed, but first, the good parts of the day. I had a very nice lunch and dinner with dh and had a good afternoon with baby. He is really drooly tonight and still awake at 9 p.m. Wait, he just fell asleep.

Now to the rest of the day which has been pretty sucky!

I expected to hear something from that job in my office this week but I had not, so I was going to call this afternoon. And then the big boss came and asked me about it too. So I call. No one answers, but they called me back while we were at lunch. The answer: my application was rejected due to a lack of professional experience. The minimum requirement is three years and a MA. Well, I have the M.A. I was a T.A. for 3 semesters. I taught junior high/high school for a year and a half. I volunteered in the state archives for about 4-6 months. I interned with the largest private preservation group in the country, doing field work. I've been at my present job since January. I thought the big boss would speak up for me and help me out. I was mistaken. She called and made it clear that she didn't think I had the necessary experience. She said the ms/hs experience definitely didn't count (although it's in the right field! I guess teachers aren't professionals). She told me to focus on being a new mommy and to take consolation in the fact that I will be eligible for a 5% raise in January. Whoopee!

I'm disappointed and hurt. I've already begun the training to fill this position on an interim basis. But I don't plan to do it because I am not "qualified." That is if I go back. I may not. I may just focus on my child.

Birthdays

This photo is from today as baby and I were playing on the computer.

Tomorrow is my 29th birthday.

I've been reflecting on my birthdays over the last few years. Momentous things seem to happen around that time for me. And, it's my favorite time of the year! Let's see, in 2003, dh and I had been dating for a few months and he bought me very thoughtful gifts as he was "trying to win me over" (according to mom). In 2004, we were newlyweds and building our house. I was so sad that dh had to go to work and then he surprised me by coming home after a mandatory morning meeting. We had a great day. 2005 was miserable. It was shortly before the Christmas from hell. We'd been ttc since May and each month, I became more and more scared that something was wrong. Each month as AF arrived, I became an emotional wreck. My birthday was on the weekend, I think. We'd had a sunday school party on Saturday night at our house. Midway through the party, AF arrived. I was devastated, but had to go out and be festive. The next day, we had my birthday lunch at our house. We had pizza and MIL had made me a cake. And then my little niece announced that she was going to be a "big sister." Sorry, K, but I had a hard time keeping it together. I was thrilled, but so very jealous. Not a good birthday all the way around. Last year, was much better. I had started the Lupron injections and was anxious to really get going with the IVF cycle. Also, I was looking forward to several job interviews. This year, it's kind of anti-climactic. I'm tired and don't really want to do anything -- I just want to come home and be with dh and baby since my mom couldn't be here. I made the mistake of trying on some pants at my favorite store today. Big mistake. I've lost 30+ pounds, but still have a long way to go. I bought a shirt and some earrings. Thanks mom!

I've really got to get serious about the weight loss.

One Week Down

Well, I've put in my 2.5 days for this week. It wasn't bad. I certainly missed baby, but it was also nice to be out. I keep reminding myself that it's about quality time, not quantity. He is having a good time at grandma's. He comes home exhausted! I think he's afraid to take a nap for fear of missing any action! He loves his cousins.

I turned in my application for the vacant position in my office today. I should hear something next week about where I stand in terms of applicants thus far. Who knows! I am being trained to do the job currently. If I do not get the job, I will not do the job during the transition and will not train the new person. Sorry, but I'm not that big of a sucker.

My office is having a birthday party for me on Tuesday. Dh is taking off next Friday to spend with me. That should be fun!

Baby and I are off to the south tomorrow to help with a wedding. Maama is keeping baby while I help out.

First Day Back

Well, we all survived. I left home at 6:59 a.m. and got home at 6:15 p.m. Quit a long day. Baby was tired and fell asleep at 7:40. He played whrn we got home -- he wanted to walk all over the room with me holding him up. He's prett cute and thinks he is big stuff!

Pumping was fun. I have to take something to read or listen to my ipod -- otherwise it's very boring. Maybe I'll get more milk now that I am pumping on a consistent basis with no one to interrupt me! Well, there were some interruptions. When I pumped at lunch, five people knocked on the door. There was also a screaming kid outside the door.

Bedtime!