Still Alive

I've had several people tell me that they've checked my new blog but that there's nothing new. Well, I've been savoring our news and I've been busy relaxing! I've also been busy -- decorating for Christmas, planning, etc. I know, all very lame excuses.

Really, there's not a lot to tell, except that I seem to be blossoming. Maybe I'm just paranoid and not wanting clothes to touch my stomach.

I went in for my second beta on Monday and my hcg levels were ahead of schedule. They were 576 (and should have been 574 on Tuesday). My next appointment is scheduled for Dec. 11th at 10:30 for an ultrasound. At this appointment we will be making sure that the embryo implanted in the correct place and if so, how many embryos are there. Hopefully, all goes well. I'm a little nervous, but am trying to just have faith.

Happy Thanksgiving

And do we have something to be thankful for. Actually, we have a lot to be thankful for -- Scott has a new job, I have a new job, and we got a BFP (big fat positive) this morning.

It was a long drawn out process. We were at the clinic by 8:00 and done by 8:15. They told us it would take an hour for results. It took more like 2 hours and 45 minutes. I couldn't tell anything from the nurse's tone. She asked if I was okay and if dh was with me. He wasn't (we were at his office and he'd gone to the restroom). So, I knew, then my mom (who was waiting with me), then dh. Mom wanted to start calling people immediately, but I wouldn't let her until I told dh. Then we started calling everybody (no way to keep it a secret when you conceive this way!).

Anyway, it's rather surreal. We went out for lunch to celebrate. Now mom is helping me get ready for our dinner party this evening. So it has yet to really sink in. Hopefully everything goes smoothly. I go back to the doctor on Monday morning.

We are so thankful. God is good.

8dp3dt

Struggling -- that's the word for today, and last night. Alternating between hope and despair. What fun! DH is not at all optimistic. I'm trying to be prepared for the worst, while hoping for a miracle.

The minor to moderate cramps continue. I've had slight, fleeting headaches. But there is a notable absence of bosom related pain. Earlier in the week, they were very sore. Now, not really. My booty is very, very sore. The left side is the worst.

So, I'm trying to keep myself distracted with light duty cleaning (dusting and laundry), reading (but I finished my book), and watching chick flicks (My Big Fat Greek Wedding followed by Sense and Sensibility).

6dp3dt

I was too busy to even post yesterday! (Actually, I probably did have time but I was really, really tired.) I had to go in for day 8 bloodwork to test my progesterone. I thought I'd gotten away with a good number because the clinic didn't call for like 2 hours, but no way, I had to increase my shot. Yucko!

After going to the clinic, I had lunch with dh and then went to the school to finish up grades for progress reports. I will have to go in next week to make sure everything is ready for the subs and do some final grading (and get my desk chair!).

Then, I came home and crashed because I was exhausted. I tried to sleep but could not.

After that, I went to get my shot and then headed to mil's for her and bil's birthday party. Came home and read because dh was out playing pool with his friend who is getting married today.

So, we have a wedding and lots of football scheduled for today. We still have to find a present but I think we have something in mind. Should be an interesting day! :)

4dp3dt

Today was a long day. Dh is making me rest. I just finished making some icing for a cake we're having for dinner. Actually two different icings.

This was my last day "in class." I will be making appearances at school, but not teaching class. I will be behind the scenes, making the lesson plans, grading papers, etc. I made it through most of the assignments from my absence today. One of my subs failed to give a test!!!! I even told him where it would be. Oh, well. Too late now! My boss has been very understanding and I am so thankful. He asked me if I'd lost weight today! No, just not so swollen!!!

I've had some stomach twinges, a tiny bit of nausea, and a small headache. Who knows. Tomorrow I go in for a progesterone level check. Days are going by pretty quickly.

3dp3dt

Good day! Well another day of bedrest is almost done. Thank goodness! Today actually went by pretty quickly, but we both miss mom. She needs to come back soon. The "no housework" clause is really tough. Dh is currently concocting a cake for dinner tomorrow night. We're having guests and dh is making burgers, too.

I didn't feel really great today. Hopefully it was implantation pain. Otherwise, my discomfort must have been from the surgery and the progesterone. My bo bo really really hurts at this point, even though my shot giver is really good.

Tomorrow it's back to school for my last sort of "real" day there. It's a practice test day (for state tests) so I really only have one class, I think. I have a ton of grading to take care of, but I plan to plow through it. I hope I feel up to the challenge, although I would gladly welcome implantation cramps!! Wish me luck.

2dp3dt

Bedrest, bedrest, bedrest. I'm tired of the couch!

MIL, SIL, and nieces and nephews came today -- it was fun. Niece K called our embryo pics "pancakes."

My principal says they've interviewed six candidates for my position. He said it would be okay for Thursday to be my last day. However, I may have to go in later to do grading. I guess we'll see.

Mom just left. :( She had to leave before "we started rolling our eyes at her." Actually she was worried about an incoming cold front hurting some of her plants. We will definitely miss her.

1dp3dt

Okay, just some explanation on the terminology. Today I am at one day past a three day transfer, hence the 1dp3dt.

Today was just bedrest and lots of tv. Bedrest is getting old but I'm staying down as long as I can.

"Pregnant Until Proven Otherwise"

That's what my doctor said this morning when he finished the transfer. He was very tired (must have been up early/late delivering babies). But apparently the deed was done and I'm now "carrying":

one "perfect" 8 cell embryo (day 3 in development)
one "slightly fragmented" 4 cell embryo (day 2 in development)

We have a picture that I may try to post later.

I'm now resting obediently on the couch and will be most of the week. I'm very happy to have made it to this stage. Late last week we were afraid we'd end up with nothing to transfer. Now we've been blessed with two -- hopefully the two we're supposed to have. We're very thankful.

Joy Comes in the Morning

I was so worried last night -- worried that our embryos would not survive the night. I don't think that either of us slept very well. But this morning we still have two. We have the original one that fertilized normally as well as the one that was fertilized yesterday. They still have a long way to go and we know that something could still happen, but they made it through the night.

The first one is now a "perfect" four-cell.
The other one is a one-cell (which is what it should be a day after fertilization).

Transfer is scheduled for 10 a.m. Sunday morning.

So, we're living for today, thankful that for now we have two little embies. Please pray that they divide/keep dividing and that one or both stick around for a long while!

Not What We Were Hoping For . . . But

Here's the fertilization report:

1 was empty (shaped like a donut)
1 was fractured (due to the suction at retrieval)
1 didn't survive ICSI
1 was immature upon retrieval, but mature today -- ICSI'd today
2 were ICSI'd but don't appear to have done anything
1 fertilized normally

Those last 4 will be watched until tomorrow -- tomorrow a decision will be made about transfer. It looks like they may want to transfer on Sunday for fear of losing all of them.

Certainly not what I wanted to hear. But we only really want one -- so maybe God is making our transfer decision easier. Please pray they divide!

7 is Dh's favorite number

It took two tries to get in my iv. The first one in the top of my left hand really hurt and then the vein blew out. The second in my right arm barely hurt and it worked!

Then it was into the OR -- I really don't remember anything but laying down and putting my legs up -- I was already sleepy then. It took about 40 minutes instead of 30, but I woke up fairly quickly. The first thing I asked was "how many?"

The answer: 7.

I was shocked and upset. But then some perspective -- the person after me only got 4. The nurses said they hope for 5 or more. Apparently my giant follicle may have been a nice cyst!

I had major cramps afterwards -- they gave me some meds and I took tylenol at home. Now, I feel pretty good, just a little sore and somewhat tired. Mom and I have napped several times (she doesn't seem to be feeling very well either).

Now we are just waiting for the fertilization report from the embryologist tomorrow. Please pray for good news.

Time to Retrieve

Well, retrieval is scheduled for 7 a.m. on Thursday morning. We have to be there at 6:30 -- what a lovely early morning we will have! Will update afterwards -- we should be home around 10 a.m.

Trials with the Trigger Shot

Well, we got to trigger on Tuesday night. I mean I got to. I had planned for Aunt Donna to, but we ended up with tickets to the Hornets game. So, I got to give myself a shot in the upper right quadrant of my bum in the bathroom at the Ford Center! I used the diaper changing table for mixing. I got so scared I was literally shaking. DH got worried about me and sent someone to check on me. I did have to call the nurse to help me through it. I only hope I did it right!

Day 10 Update

Another day, another ultrasound and more bloodwork. But, the good nurse was there today so the blood draw didn't hurt.

Well, my largest follicle is over 22 mm -- the others are between 14 and 16 mm each (there are some smaller ones). The decision was made for me to wait another day for trigger. So, I go back tomorrow for more bloodwork and another ultrasound. Hopefully everything is ready then and we can move on to trigger. Who knows though. I guess we'll see. Right now, retrieval is tentatively scheduled for Thursday. Transfer would then be Monday.

Tonight I'm tired . . . very tired. Taking a bath exhausted me. I'm trying to work up the energy to iron. :) You all know that's my favorite thing!

Day 9 Update

We have an overachieving follicle! This morning the nurse found one follicle that is already 18mm. The rest are around 14 to 16 mm. So, I go back in tomorrow morning for another ultrasound and more bloodwork. Hopefully then we'll find out the dates for trigger and retrieval. Most likely retrieval will be Wednesday or Thursday -- that way the smaller follicles have a chance to catch up.

Will update tomorrow.

Day 7 Update

Well, everything went fine at my Day 7 appointment. My lining looked good. My 12 measurable follicles were between 10 and 12 mm each. There are smaller ones, but who knows if they will catch up. They are nice and round and similar in size, which is what the clinic likes to see. My estradiol was 328 which is more than double Wednesday's number (it should double every 2 days). Yesterday's nurse thinks retrieval will probably be Friday instead of Wednesday. This is most likely thanks to the aygestin -- which more completely shuts down your system. Apparently, it is taking my body a while to reboot.

We go back on Sunday for another check-up. And dh gets to go with me! I hope to hear that we're a go for Wednesday, but whatever. Only a few more days of these little shots and then the big ones begin (the progesterone that is daily and the one time hcg "trigger" shot).

I've been composing an apology email all morning to the director of the Oklahoma History Museum (the guy who offered me the first job that I accepted and then turned back?). He was not super nice yesterday when I talked to him and it bothered me all day, all night, today . . . Hopefully this message will help me resolve my "guilt." I feel like I had no choice, but apparently he thought I should work more days for less pay. Whatever! I go from being angry at him for being ungentlemanly to being upset with myself. Oh the joys of being overanalytical. Thanks mom and dad. :)

Historic Preservation Specialist

That's my new title!!!!! I was looking to get the call tomorrow morning. In fact, I expected the phone to ring during my ultrasound. But they called today. I am soooo excited. I am sitting beside dh right now begging him to take me to dinner to celebrate. I had thought the job was going to be a slight pay raise, but after dh crunched the numbers, it's actually a slight decrease. But, I don't care!! And I get to pick my start date.

As for ivf, I screwed up my shot this morning, but hopefully everything will even out and we'll get good news tomorrow.

Updates

Well, today was my day 5 ultrasound. Everything was just "fine." We had at least 12 follicles (the sack that contains the egg) between 6 and 7 mm. There were additional smaller follicles that may or may not catch up. My estradiol level was 128. I will continue with 150 iu of Menopur and 10 mls of Lupron tonight. I will finish off my follistim pen tomorrow and then up my Menopur to 225 iu. Then, I will go back on Friday for more bloodwork and another ultrasound. The ultrasound isn't horrible, but it takes a while to find and measure all the follicles -- which can get a little uncomfortable.

In other news, I officially "gave notice" today. My boss wants me to stay on until the 21st unless he finds someone soon. I hope he finds someone, because I want my last day to be no later than 2 weeks from today. Oh, and I finally got my state "pay raise" that you are hearing so much in the news about these days. We were to get it in September, then October, now in November we finally get it. Great thing is that I will have to give it back because I will not finish the year. Perfect timing! Mr. W (my boss) did take the news better than I expected. However, I didn't tell him I was starting a new job in December. I just said we decided teaching was too stressful during this process.

Time for my shots!